Chasing My Dreams

One of the funniest things about life is discovering what your dreams really are, some times it takes seriously taking time to have some very serious conversations with yourself to figure it out. I mean you can tell lies to everyone one about what it is your really want to do, but you can't continue to lie to yourself. And why would you want to? When you finally do discover what it is that is truly going to make you happy you have to go after it with everything in your power to make your dream a reality, no matter what it takes.

All my life I have been told by people in my family of what I should and shouldn't be doing with my life. Everyone is so focused on me having a good job getting married have and having children. Leading the traditional American life. But what most of them fail to see is that I am not a traditional person in that regard. I do want to get married, and I do want to have children. But my dreams take me outside of working a regular 9-5 type of job. I have done it before and I am sure that I will continue to do so until I can get to where I want to be with my dream, but encouragement from the people that you love in life can take you a long, but when it is lacking it can make things 10 times harder than it really has to be.

If I never make it as a well known writer I can live with that, but what I can not live with is not trying. That would be the death of me. And I think that is something for people who are not creative or don't carry that creative energy the way that I do, don't understand. I have to be able to create my art in able for me to survive and keep my sanity. I am not like everyone else in my family and that is something that they don't seem to understand. But if I blow up and become the next Bebe Moore Campbell, Zane, Terry McMillan, Dan Brown, Nora Roberts, or Nikki Giovanni than everyone of course is going to say that they knew it was destined for me to lead this type of life. Bull feathers!!!!

We all have our hurdles to jump and this is one of mine. So to get out of the time and place that I am in right now I am moving to a better environment so that my creativity can be free because I will be around creative minds that function like I function, which makes me happy.

I feel like I got a late start because in my younger years I was pushed to the music side which I love but is not #1 in my life. But that was a conclusion that I had to come to in my own time, when He was ready for me to come to terms with that. Now that I think I am close to being on the same page as He is, I am ready to it take it on and begin again by refocusing and rededicating myself to my dreams and pursing them so that I can make myself happy first and not worry about trying to please everyone else. They will fall in line eventually, if not oh well, I have people that believe in my abilities that are not tied to me by blood, but by the grace of God and that is perfectly alright with me.